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In the ninth grade biology class I teach, there is a boy named Ed and a girl named Bella. I have paired them up for every lab assignment we have had so far in this year in hopes that they will get together. I even asked my supervisors permission to hold a blood testing day. MLIT

#274
119 Comments

So twilight! (4048) - Needs more twilight.. (1616)

Nov 30, 2009 05:20 PM - School - by WishIwasBellaSwan

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your a match maker too?! lol

#1 - Dec 10, 2009 01:08 AM by Aitrus
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haha. that's hilarious. :D That's be totally awesome if they did get together.

#2 - Dec 10, 2009 02:10 PM by StefanieReneeCullen
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Funniest post by far. Hope it's true...that's too funny

#3 - Dec 11, 2009 01:32 AM by Dolly
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LET THEM GO OUT WITH WHO THEY WANT TO GO OUT WITH!!! JUST BECAUSE THEY HAVE THE SAME NAME OF A COUPLE IN A BOOK DOESN'T MEAN THEY WILL GET TOGETHER IN REAL LIFE!!! ASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#4 - Dec 11, 2009 06:06 PM by TwilightHater13
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I'll be honest; if I were one of them, I'd be creeped out.

#5 - Dec 11, 2009 11:18 PM by OMGLOGIC
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After reading this post I sent it to all my twilight friends on facebooks. I would do the exact same.

#6 - Dec 13, 2009 06:52 PM by Alice Cullen14
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This is fake, troll.

#7 - Dec 14, 2009 11:55 AM by teamlestat
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Hope this is true! i would do the same freaking thing!

#8 - Dec 14, 2009 02:51 PM by cecibucos
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That is creepy

#9 - Dec 14, 2009 06:09 PM by Juniorauror
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Maybe you should concentrate on teaching them Biology instead of playing matchmaker to your sick obsessions. Kay?

#10 - Dec 14, 2009 07:12 PM by Karen
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YOU'RE A SICK FUCK! A BLOOD TEST? A MOTHER FUCKING BLOOD TEST! YOU SHOULD BE IN JAIL!

#11 - Dec 16, 2009 12:05 AM by uberkill
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Alas, a teacher that likes Twilight? The education system has gone to the dogs!

#12 - Dec 16, 2009 06:10 PM by magicness
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no. You need to leave the kids the hell alone and not push YOUR obsession onto them. That's just bloody WRONG, I hope you get your license to teach revoked for that BS

#13 - Dec 19, 2009 07:00 AM by sardonic
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please let the kids be themselves you sound like a bad teacher

#14 - Dec 19, 2009 12:54 PM by littlefilthyrose
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Way to be professional.

#15 - Dec 20, 2009 04:08 PM by Antiandproud
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I agree with antiandproud. So funny. And that really is screwed up. They're teenagers! Let them go out with whoever they want!!

#16 - Dec 21, 2009 06:43 AM by Twilight=EPICFAIL
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you are making those kids commit suicide. do yo ever think about how other people feel?

#17 - Dec 21, 2009 10:38 AM by harrypotter>twi****t
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Lol. I thought adults were supposed to be mature.

#18 - Dec 21, 2009 10:59 AM by EdtardSullen
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Nice quote magicness. Oh, and you are a LOSER. A sick and twisted LOSER. I'm ashamed to say that I have read the-books-that-must-not-be-named.

#19 - Dec 21, 2009 07:52 PM by TheLastMarauder
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Oh, I just realized that my comment sounded mean. I meant: Nice quote magicness. Oh, and WishIWasBellaSwan, you are a LOSER. A sick and twisted LOSER. I'm ashamed to say that I have read the-books-that-must-not-be-named.

#20 - Dec 21, 2009 07:53 PM by TheLastMarauder
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You're not very mature for an adult...

#21 - Dec 21, 2009 10:57 PM by Alayne
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Because, you know, ever girl's dream guy is an abusive, sparkling, dead pedophile- right? right! NOT. Please get a life and stop ruining the future of humanity!

#22 - Dec 22, 2009 01:36 PM by REALITY_CHECK
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wow im so glad to know that there are teachers out there that care more about twilight than MOLDING THE NEXT GENERATION! get a fucking life and stay the hell out of those poor kids lifes!

#23 - Dec 23, 2009 04:18 PM by HP_ismylife
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Oh, just do a blood test, and we'll see if Ed runs off, then we'll MAKE Bella go out with him :) Just so he can eat her

#24 - Dec 23, 2009 08:11 PM by HPftw
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you are a terrible teacher. i would cry if i had to sit in that class every day. why are you trying to manipulate their lives? you can't control who they go out with. let them be their own people, not your messed up book characters!!!!!

#25 - Dec 24, 2009 09:14 AM by bookwork_13
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So cuteXDDD

#26 - Dec 26, 2009 12:35 PM by HP&Twilight4ever
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uhm

#27 - Dec 26, 2009 07:32 PM by Iamasparklingfaggot
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maybe you should keep them apart. the lord knows we don't need any more drama in the world.

#28 - Dec 26, 2009 08:53 PM by iheartcedric
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What the fuck is your problem?

#29 - Dec 27, 2009 03:07 PM by SailorGoldRabbit
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I never knew a teacher to be a matchmaker. :)

#30 - Dec 28, 2009 10:55 AM by QueenVampire147
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Stop harassing your poor students, ffs.

#31 - Dec 29, 2009 09:21 AM by ExpectoPatronum
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That's insanely creepy. I can only imagine what would happen if my 9th grade bio teacher tried to play matchmaker WITH HIS STUDENTS. God. Stop pushing your asinine infatuation on them.

#32 - Dec 29, 2009 04:34 PM by alyssa
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wow. the things kids are being taught these days.

#33 - Dec 29, 2009 10:26 PM by sparklygayvampire101
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Paedo....

#34 - Dec 30, 2009 01:22 PM by MyLifeIsWizard.
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dude...that is soo dAMN creepy...seriously though...

#35 - Dec 30, 2009 01:57 PM by Ur_Worst_nightmare
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IT'S. A. FUCKING. BOOK.

#36 - Dec 31, 2009 10:57 AM by So... yeah
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Check out http://www.mylifeisfly.com

#37 - Jan 2, 2010 03:54 PM by yoyooyyo
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You should lose your liscence to teach. That is undue and concealed manipulation of student's private affairs!

#38 - Jan 3, 2010 04:02 AM by Sweetness
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Okay this is scary.. Poor, poor boy.. I am sure your friends stopped giving him love potion after that :)

#39 - Jan 3, 2010 04:07 AM by RoonilWazlib
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Ummm, and you're a teacher...?

#40 - Jan 3, 2010 05:20 PM by BellatrixCameFirst
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funny:)

#41 - Jan 4, 2010 01:09 PM by edward_and_bella4ever
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not funny. sad. creepy. pathetic. horrifying.

#42 - Jan 4, 2010 07:16 PM by bookwork_13
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fail. your life is a fail.

#43 - Jan 5, 2010 10:44 AM by HarryPotterLives
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You don't deserve to have that job.

#44 - Jan 5, 2010 04:23 PM by Severus_Snape FTW
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thats borderline pedaphile

#45 - Jan 5, 2010 05:05 PM by Ibonedrobertpattinson
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You are a horrible person, a horrible teacher and a ridiculous human being. You can't play matchmaker with students just because you're freakishly obsessed with a sub-literate trash romance intended for eleven year olds.

#46 - Jan 6, 2010 09:28 AM by ainekatt
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well I guess it's a good thing you don't teach English, as you obviously have no taste in literature. creep.

#47 - Jan 6, 2010 01:57 PM by omgwtfbbq
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That's disgusting. How flippin old are you??

#48 - Jan 7, 2010 01:21 AM by twilightbites
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that's just gross

#49 - Jan 7, 2010 04:15 AM by xhpx
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If my teacher did that... I would threaten to kill myself until they change my schedule. PS- If this is what you do to entertain yourself, please go die. KTHNXBAI

#50 - Jan 9, 2010 11:04 PM by DieEdwardTheStalkerDie
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Twilight is a disgrace to the film and literature industries. The fans are all positively delusional, and seem to be under the impression that they are all real characters. Every character in twilight is a one dimensional git. Edward is quite possibly the most abusive, over-protective, pedophile boyfriend imaginable. Bella is a Mary-Sue with no emotions and is only attracted to Edward because of his appearance. And she reminds us so every few pages, as that's the only thing about him that she ever comments on. She never compliments his personality, only his face. And Jacob's just a pedophile. I understand that Twilight is supposed to be a love story for pre-teen girls, but there's nothing about love in Twilight. It's about lust. And the fourth book is definitely not acceptable for pre-teens. It's pretty well all about Bella and Edward's sex life. And don't even get me started on Stephanie Meyer's complete disregard for traditional vampire customs. Vampires are supposed to be reduced to ashes in the sunlight. Edward looks like he just got into the body glitter. Vampires are supposed to drink human blood, and have fangs. The fact that twilight "vampires" have no fangs just furthers my point that they're not really vampires. There are just so many things that are wrong with this series, and I'm wasting my time writing this. Twilight: The story of a girl's choice between Necrophilia and Bestiality.

#51 - Jan 11, 2010 08:00 AM by Lestat is a sex beast
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wow. it's good to see that your "teaching" your students to completely ignore their education, become obbessed with that God-awful book, and make out with a boy, who has the same name as a fictional 108 year old virgin who displays 6 of the eight signs of being a sociopath, in the middle of your class. your life is not twilight. your life is a fail.

#52 - Jan 11, 2010 10:14 AM by HarryPotterLives
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Mrs. Monty?!?!?

#53 - Jan 11, 2010 02:47 PM by TDHBM
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isnt that unsanitary??? and realy? are you so obssesed that you have to pair kids up like that and do a blood test. and wht if bella realy does faint or almost faint, it wouldnt realy be something worth trying. and no i dont think ed and bell will get together because ppl would probably laugh sry. LIVE ON POTTER FANAITICS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#54 - Jan 11, 2010 03:20 PM by hermioniegranger-go harry
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Today i found a site called www.mylifeistwillight.com and realized that not even the stupidity of the 4th book will probably not be enough to make you weird Twihards to wake up to the Real world, the future is screwed.

#55 - Jan 12, 2010 12:23 AM by Buffy
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Also i came to this comment page expecting to find a Bunch of Twitards calling this MLIT a good idea, THANKFULLY mostly healthy people post here. I've flagged abuse for the rest.

#56 - Jan 12, 2010 12:25 AM by Buffy
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That is absolutely disgusting.

#57 - Jan 12, 2010 01:59 AM by sadday
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hahhhaha, thats great. wish i had u for biology, ^_^

#58 - Jan 13, 2010 05:26 PM by ranidayys
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I hope you get arrested for being a pedo.

#59 - Jan 13, 2010 05:26 PM by ANormalTwilightFan
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ew those poor students have some professionalism

#60 - Jan 13, 2010 10:23 PM by harrypotterftw!
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OMG!! people who don't like twilight GO THE F*** AWAY!!!! you people obviously can't read! the title is called MY LIFE IS TWILIGHT!!! don't you realise the two words LIFE and TWILIGHT? if not you must be dumb. leave us twilighters alone! We don't bag about your obsession! so leave us be and get out of our lives!

#61 - Jan 13, 2010 11:14 PM by MrsEmmettCullen
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If i were an official at the pathetic high school you teach at i would do everything in my power to see that you never teach again and place you in the loony bin. you are a disgrace to society, its people like you that make america look so bad. i'm ashamed to be in this generation of materialism, lust, envy, greed, and all around diminishing IQ of the human gene pool. Idiocracy is here!

#62 - Jan 15, 2010 10:36 PM by iholdtwilghtbookburnings
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that's really mean...

#63 - Jan 16, 2010 02:12 AM by abcdefg
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im terrified of you.

#64 - Jan 17, 2010 02:48 PM by gay4twilight666
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YOU'RE AN ADULT??

#65 - Jan 19, 2010 07:29 PM by go.die.in.a.hole
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You're a horrible teacher and you deserve to be dragged into the middle of the street for all to see shot execution style. Repeatedly.

#66 - Jan 24, 2010 09:39 PM by tman523
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cute idea. why is everyone freaking? the teacher isnt forcing them to be together, they're only partners in a class, the teacher isnt making them get married or anything....

#67 - Jan 26, 2010 12:39 PM by wpuvolleyball9
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You are a terrible teacher for trying to interfere with student's love lives. If they don't like each other then they won't and you can't do a flying shit about it.

#68 - Jan 27, 2010 05:52 PM by harrpotterroxmysox
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Edawrd was in the nazi regime--True story...

#69 - Jan 30, 2010 04:53 PM by bigassedwardloverr
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(1). WOMAN, YOU ARE INSANE. WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM?! That is just sick and pathetic. Stop trying to bring to life the bloody God-forsaken thing. Besides, you're a wreck of a teacher. I'd be ashamed to be your supervisor and have to stand my ground against hellbent parents because of you.

#70 - Feb 22, 2010 11:23 AM by TeamVanHelsingFTW
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i'm sorry but that is REALLY PATHETIC. right now ED is probably so far in the friend zone that he knows all her secrets and the things she does with her Actual boyfriend.

#71 - Feb 26, 2010 02:08 AM by SHOOT EDWARD IN THE FACE
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I am nuetral in this fight thing. I think it's cute that you have them paired up..and in biology class. I mean the whole idea is neat, and cute. Like another person said in these comments, it's not like you're forcing them to do anything. But I think you definitely went overboard asking if you could have a blood testing day. Also, didn't these two people figure out what's going on yet? If not, they are blind. If they have...I mean, do you actually believe they are going to start dating? Just because they have those names does not mean they might have the least interest in dating eachother. So, I thought this submission was cute, yet very bizarre. Also...no offense, but it is a little immature. Funny, but...did you actually think it was going to work!? I doubt it. Also..one more thing...I highly suspect that this submission is fake. Sorry! :-'(

#72 - Mar 22, 2010 06:07 PM by rae1911
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um.....................................wow...............well.........huh? I don't get your logic, your taking it a bit too far....

#73 - Mar 28, 2010 10:03 PM by cathyfang1533
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I hope Ed isn't a 108 year old virgin.

#74 - Apr 1, 2010 07:49 AM by Facebook
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You're a teacher! How could you do this to your students?! Their lives are hard enough as is. Do you really want to make it worse? Isn't it bad enough that they share a name with those...those...I can't even think of a word harsh enough for them.

#75 - Apr 5, 2010 06:27 AM by TwilightBasher
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I'm pretty sure this files under some sort of sexual harrasment. And if it doesn't it totally should! But lol, this is funny! ^.^

#76 - Apr 5, 2010 05:15 PM by EdCullenAteMyGirl
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If I was one of them and I had to live with that I would pull a Draco Malfoy and transfer to Pig Farts

#77 - May 9, 2010 02:53 PM by gryffindorseeker
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I can't believe adults enjoy Twilight. I understand preteens and maybe even teenage girls that can't get a boyfriend, but an adult? Additionally, doing something like trying to get two students together is just wrong; a teacher shouldn't get involved in student's relationships. If I was one of those students, I would complain to the principal about you.

#78 - May 24, 2010 10:30 PM by orangejuice
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I hope you aren't serious. This is borderline depressing. You have no right as a teacher to play around with these kids' social lives. I'm trying not to get too worked up over a post, but you disgust me. I'd love to hear you try to explain your reasoning here. -___- You give Twilight fans a bad name.

#79 - May 25, 2010 05:25 PM by shutdabeepup
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You're a fucking disgrace of a human being and sick fucks like you are the primary reason that the American School systems are failing so hard right now. Grow up you loser.

#80 - May 30, 2010 12:35 PM by SeriouslyGuise
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What the fuck is wrong with you?

#81 - Jun 27, 2010 08:04 PM by Miss Mae
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I hope your supervisor says no. Especially considering that, as a teacher, you really ought to know blood tests such as that aren't performed, or at least are rarely performed, in non-fictional high schools anymore because of the issues related to contagious diseases.

#82 - Jul 2, 2010 09:45 PM by Team Rocket
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You shouldn't be a teacher. I hope this is a troll

#83 - Jul 5, 2010 04:53 PM by maraudersmap
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Open the door. Step outside. See it all? Its called the Real World. Try living in it. They aren't characters in a ficitonal book. There are real people. With real feelings. Let them do what they want to do and be fair to the class. Its THEIR life. Dear God. And your an adult? WHO TEACHES!?

#84 - Jul 11, 2010 10:13 AM by Lovegood
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That is disgusting!! How dare you try to ruin the lives of these students!! HOW DID YOU BECOME A TEACHER??????

#85 - Aug 3, 2010 03:21 PM by Abby Black,Licensed Auror
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No. Just no. You are pathetic. I normally leave comments that are helpful to the OP, but... You sicken me. You are a sorry excuse for a human being. There is a 99.9% chance that you will burn in hell for this, the other 0.1% being that you are forced to wander the space between heaven and hell for all eternity. With that, I bid you farehorribly.

#86 - Aug 17, 2010 07:47 PM by Thrall
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@OP: Cool

#87 - Aug 26, 2010 07:26 AM by ShadowReaper1357
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I can't believe they gave you a teaching licsence, WishIWasBellaSwan. Grow up. And people wonder why our test scores are so low....

#88 - Aug 27, 2010 07:11 PM by deathtoallthingssparkly
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lol

#89 - Sep 10, 2010 07:33 AM by ShadowReaper1357
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Dudes this is an i love twilight site....if you HATE twilight go away! leave us alone. I'm not OBSESSED with twilight but i like it and you people are soooo rude. Y does it matter if this submission is fake? it is for fun and people of all ages are allowed to read and like twilight it a book that's open to everyone not just teenage girls. She is just trying to be funny ok? you guys are all taking this wayyyyyyy to seriously. Pedophiles are sick people who try to GO AFTER kids under 18. She just trying to make people laff by doing this or by submitting it. If the kids don't like each other they'll complain to the teacher or make it known the don't like each other. And im positive that SHES the one with a teaching degree (that none of you have) that she went to school four like 4 years for and paid for all the books and classes and everything while you guys sit on your butts hating on other peoples entertainments. Sorry if you don't like the book but ITS FICTION people its really not hurting anything or anyone so shut up and do what you like to do besides bringing people down to make your self feel all high and mighty.

#90 - Sep 25, 2010 03:47 PM by Tiff
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Erm, shouldn't you be paying more attention to teaching than to playing match maker with a couple of unfortunate teens with unfortunate names? I'm so sorry Ed and Bella that you were unlucky enough to get the names of a sparkly vampire and a disturbed teenage girl.

#91 - Oct 24, 2010 10:48 AM by DumbledoresArmy4Ever
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I hope this is just a troll... for many legal and medical reasons schools cant hold bloodtests (you know, modern day AIDS/HIV awareness and all that)

#92 - Nov 12, 2010 08:05 PM by Cedric_Owns_Edward
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You.... have issues...

#93 - Nov 20, 2010 06:52 PM by Viktorhatestwilight
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I'm getting kinda annoyed. HP fans, get your hatin' asses off this website. If they go trolling on our HP websites, feel free to burn the trollers at stake. Don't just take your anger issues out on some poor innocent OP that's trying to make a joke.

#94 - Dec 1, 2010 12:30 PM by Chochilalala
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Really? Your life is so sad you have to mess with others? Oh and Tw*l*ght fans remember: When the love of Hermione's life left her, she continued to search for the keys to destroying the world's most powerful dark wizard. When the love of Bella's life left her, she curled up in the fetal position, went numb for months then jumped off a cliff.

#95 - Dec 22, 2010 11:15 AM by L Lawliet -hates Tw*l*ght
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I don't even have much to say anymore. Really, this one isn't as bad as some of the others I've seen, but still...

#96 - Dec 25, 2010 03:09 PM by GiveUsBackCedric!
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Yes, because, you know, you don't want them to have any choice of their own in life. @96, I know right? Pansypansypansy Bella, tsktsktsk.

#97 - Dec 25, 2010 03:22 PM by EmmsterHP
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I feel sorry for those kids.

#98 - Jan 3, 2011 01:50 AM by proudpotterfan
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Creeeeeperrrrrr. Seriously. What the fuck.

#99 - Jan 3, 2011 01:03 PM by Scarfofsexualpreferance
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seriously you would do some sick thing like that? maybe they are rivals. dont get all up in their buisness like that. if i were one of them i would feel like being sexually harrased. and a blood test? have you read the books? bella is supposed to faint and you want that to happen to one of you students? you are sick.

#100 - Jan 21, 2011 06:35 PM by MLIAintruder
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Why? What if they hate each other? Isn't the point of partners to allow students to work with different people??? Jeeze.... poor kids... what if they are HP fans??? And I am on here to save these children.

#101 - Jan 22, 2011 11:06 PM by HPotter>Twilight
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@91, FYI i DO have a teaching degree, and I DID go to university for it. Stop making f***ing assumptions that your o so mighty OP it the best thing here. And i agree with 96, Hermione rules over Bella

#102 - Jan 29, 2011 07:04 PM by twilighthater123
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I want to place you in a pit with 15 creepers and see what happens. You'll probably be blown to bits. It will be entertaining.

#103 - Jan 29, 2011 08:22 PM by Notch
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that's so mean! those kids will have to go to a therapist when they're older! jerk.

#104 - Jan 30, 2011 06:47 PM by whereswaldo
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Pretty sure I saw one of these students complaining about her teacher on FML

#105 - Mar 10, 2011 08:03 AM by cari1288
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you pedagogue! You are a disgrace to the field of academia! How did you ever earn a teaching degree when your mind is full of that ludicrousness

#106 - May 19, 7899 01:01 PM by Penny Clearwater
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you are the reason why the education system is in the tubes... I would hate for you to be MY teacher. I think you're trying to live vicariously through "Bella." Have a little crush on "Ed" do you? Pedobear at it again!

#107 - Jul 15, 2011 10:51 PM by haterz
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Percy Jackson, if you're reading this, this is teamidontgiveacrap. We need you. Go to the discussion of names where Jazadia once resided. There you will find the address. Follow it. We will be waiting for you. Read How to Break a Twilight Curse first. Then continue to the Phoenix Song. Please hurry.

#108 - May 19, 9785 01:11 PM by Where are you, Percy????
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@carrie1288, LOL

#109 - Aug 24, 2011 09:20 AM by GryffindorGal
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THat is soooooooooooooo mean. what if bella likes a guy named harry, and ed likes a guy named lily? LET THEM GO OUT WITH WHO THEY WANT TO GO OUT WITH. geez, bad teacher.

#110 - Aug 31, 2011 02:55 PM by hp4eva22
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You know, I used to find the Twilight Saga okay, but then all these crazy fans appeared from hell and I started hating it. So Twilight fans, don't get angry at us for hating Twilight, it's your own fault that we do in the first place. MLIHP

#111 - Dec 6, 2011 06:05 PM by TeamHagridLOL
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Hey Twi-Hards and Twi-Moms, look at this: In the Heroes of Olympus (the new series by the author of Percy Jackson, Rick Riordan), when Annabeth loses Percy, the love of her life, she goes searching around the globe for him. When the love of Bella's life left her, she curled up in the fetal position, went numb for months then jumped off a cliff.

#112 - Jan 8, 2012 10:43 AM by MLIANIBD
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If they don't read twilight, then FTL ( F Their Lives

#113 - Jan 17, 2012 04:41 PM by Twilighthater42
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@ MrsEmmetCullen. If you can't even spell correcyly, you have no right to complain about haters. Not every hater is dumb like you said. In fact, we are mostly just trying to make the world a better place, one without twilight.

#114 - Jan 17, 2012 04:46 PM by Twilighthater42
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Some of us who try to rid the world of this trash actually can read

#115 - Jan 17, 2012 04:48 PM by Twilighthater42
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This is why schools should do more thorough background checks on their teachers.

#116 - Jan 23, 2012 05:38 AM by Twilight's_an_abomination
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Something tells me you'd sink as low as to give them detention together..or even threaten to fail them if they didn't get together. Get a life, maybe you should do some match making for yourself first?

#117 - May 19, 1267 01:27 PM by TwilightSagaSucks
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You need to get a new job - maybe their is a position going in Mordor as the mouth of Sauron, the Mouth obviously being a complete idiot who irritates everyone.

#118 - Jun 18, 2012 10:32 PM by Noonecares
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Seriously? Maybe you should concentrate on biology instead of making a boy and a girl with similar names as a certain Twilight couple get together. Have you got something less stupid to do? For examples, set the books on fire.

#119 - Jun 18, 2012 10:54 PM by Setstwilightonfire
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