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Last night when I was walking home from the bar because I am a maritime lawyer I accidentally tripped down the stairs and this guy caught me. His name was Edward. We talked for a while and he asked me how old I was. I said 24 and he replied, "How long have you been 24?" We're going on a date. MLIT.

#174
29 Comments

So twilight! (2378) - Needs more twilight.. (701)

Nov 30, 2009 03:08 PM - Love - by Chereth Cutestory

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XD are u serious girl u hve it made

#1 - Dec 10, 2009 02:37 PM by aurangel0309
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THAT is a TERRIFIC LINE!

#2 - Dec 11, 2009 01:33 AM by Dolly
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My name is Michael Bluth and I'm also a maritime lawyer.

#3 - Dec 15, 2009 10:16 PM by LIARr
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That's gotta be THE most retarded thing I've read in months. Serisouly, now every rapist just have to ask their victms how long have they been with the same age...

#4 - Dec 16, 2009 12:18 AM by uberkill
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hopefully when he gets the reference he'll get e restraining order or just leave because he knows unreal expectations when he sees them :)

#5 - Dec 19, 2009 08:21 AM by sardonic
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wow. faggot.

#6 - Dec 21, 2009 10:58 AM by harrypotter>twi****t
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Because, you know, ever girl's dream guy is an abusive, sparkling, dead pedophile- right? right! NOT. Please get a life and stop ruining the future of humanity!

#7 - Dec 22, 2009 01:40 PM by REALITY_CHECK
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I know a maritime lawyer. His name is Chareth Cutestory.

#8 - Jan 6, 2010 12:27 PM by teamarmand
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you know its fake when the people go on a date. "blah blah blah. we now are going out." "tralalalalaa. we have a date on friday." they will all be fake.

#9 - Jan 9, 2010 08:31 PM by twilightisstupid
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Hahaha by Chereth Cutestory!! This is the best!! But let's get real. Just because you played Captain Hook's lawyer that one time does not make you a real lawyer. Seriously.

#10 - Jan 13, 2010 05:07 AM by MundungusFletcher
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i am sick and tired of all you idiots out there who run into guys who happen to be named edward, then when they say how old they are, you say 'how long have you been (#)?' if i happened to be a guy named edward, i would walk away right then and there.

#11 - Jan 13, 2010 02:31 PM by TEAMGRYFFINDOR
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"How long have you been 24?" - You actually thought that was a Twilight reference?! Sweetie, that was a mutton-dressed-as-lamb reference! Then again, I shouldn't be surprised. Twihards do have cognitive function below that of a rock (something which, in previous times, could only be achieved by corpses).

#12 - Jan 14, 2010 09:31 PM by LeMonstre
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Go watch Arrested Development. Now. All 3 seasons. Unless there are actually maritime lawyers named Chereth Cutestory running around, this is a joke.

#13 - Jan 15, 2010 12:06 AM by MundungusFletcher
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wow......just, wow

#14 - Jan 18, 2010 12:41 PM by FredWeasley
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twilight is SHITE i watched the first film last nigyht and it is so lame and what is wiv all these vampires as if they do go round biting people craop or what!!!

#15 - Feb 5, 2010 03:07 AM by edwardisdead
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wow. you get someone who imitates bella who gave you an insult by saying something meant to be said to a sparkly cedric fairy. sad sad sad. GO POTTER!

#16 - Feb 21, 2010 11:09 AM by harrypotterkillstwilight
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ok firstly to harrypotter>twi****t your an idiot. there is absolutely no reference to the author of this posts gender so you should be asking yourself why you assumed it was a man going on a date with another man.....in a bit of denial are we? and second to LeMonstre. LMAO @ Twihards! Love it! and I am so going to adopt it now and start calling obsessive Twilight fans Twihards HAHAHA!

#17 - Mar 27, 2010 04:44 AM by Rayn
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WOW!! if you had said that to me i would have dropped you and left. no im not joking. its not a good pickup line its SAD!!!!!

#18 - Mar 28, 2010 08:50 AM by HARRY POTTER FOREVER
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I bet he takes advantage of his Twilight name and uses that pick up line all the time. I should know, I have a friend named Edward who does the same thing.

#19 - May 27, 2010 07:58 PM by DodgerGirl
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Rayn- the word Twihard....I don't find it funny at all. It's just an altered rendition of the original word 'diehard', changed to suit some teenage girl's wet dreams about some fictional character. Why you find that hilarious is beyond me.

#20 - Aug 8, 2010 03:14 PM by #1TwilightHater
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@OP: Awesome line! lol

#21 - Aug 26, 2010 04:32 AM by ShadowReaper1357
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You are 24? And youve been sucked into Tw*l*ght? And I thought my life sucked... -Moldy voldy - OUT!

#22 - Nov 12, 2010 12:34 PM by moldyvoldyhatesvampires
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@harrypotterkillstwilight- THANK YOU, MY FRIEND!!!!!! Oh, right, and Cedric... I thought I killed you?!

#23 - Nov 12, 2010 12:38 PM by moldyvoldyhatesvampires
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haha good luck :) and haters, please go fucking die in a hole ^^ Really. it'd help this world tons. Obsessives are annoying, but haters are even more annoying, if you haven't noticed.

#24 - Dec 1, 2010 12:56 PM by Chochilalala
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OOC: Can we please stop saying words like "faggot"? There are other ways to annoy people who post pathetic stories than homophobia - how about reminding them that THEY LIKE TWILIGHT, which reads like a bad fanfiction? And @Rayn, what is wrong with a man going on a date with another man, can I just ask? Being "in denial" about sexuality doesn't make you a bad person.

#25 - Feb 7, 2011 10:51 AM by lunaandtheloonies
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@lunaandtheloonies: Thank you! If these Twi-haters & HP fans could be a bit more respectful (as in, stop using faggot & swear words, telling people to kill themselves, & posting spam messages with swear words and sometimes racist words), I'd be able to tolerate them better. Of course, I can't say I enjoy what's going on on this site, even without all those stuff, but it makes you guys a bit better if you can actually show a bit of respect (I'm sorry to all you people here, for example this commenter above me, that are given a bad name by those people like fucktwilightitblows, Dirkjahad, harrypotter>twi****t, & #1TwilightHater)

#26 - Feb 16, 2011 02:00 PM by GiveUsBackCedric!
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Your lack of grammar in this sentence is terrible. You were walking home from a bar because you're a maritime lawyer? You tripped because you're a maritime lawyer? Or you are a drunk maritime lawyer and that's why you tripped? I guess I shouldn't be confused. Stephenie Meyer struggles with grammar too.

#27 - Mar 10, 2011 12:30 PM by cari1288
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Percy Jackson, if you're reading this, this is teamidontgiveacrap. We need you. Go to the discussion of names where Jazadia once resided. There you will find the address. Follow it. We will be waiting for you. Read How to Break a Twilight Curse first. Then continue to the Phoenix Song. Please hurry.

#28 - May 24, 248 01:11 PM by Where are you, Percy????
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Oh so if he was a rapist that would be fine...? And wtf does this have to do with being a maritime lawyer...??

#29 - Dec 19, 2011 03:35 PM by LilMissRenesmee
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